A Letter to My Goalie

Dear Lou,

I know that, even among Canucks' fans, it's kinda popular to hate you. But I don't. I love you. Always have. I haven't forgotten that there were times that everyone was convinced that you were the only thing giving the 'Nucks any wins. And that people thought that for a damned good reason. You've got me in your corner. Or... your trapezoid.... or... whatever, I'm on your side man.

That said... regarding the shootout last night against the Kings? .... the fuck?!

Look at all that space between you and the net! JUST LOOK AT IT, LOU. What were you thinking?!

You are brilliant at what you do. You really are. But you have never been good at being a forward goalie. Stay in the net. You cannot MIND THE NET (as per being a NETMINDER) if you are not IN THE FUCKING NET.

This is where you live.

Not here.

Here.

Now I'm not a hockey player. I know it's always a judgement call. Maybe you knew something about that Kings' forward that I don't know. Maybe you know that if the opposing goalie comes out and meets him MOTHERFUCKING HALFWAY that he irrationally freaks out and runs in the opposite direction like an elephant confronted with a mouse. But he didn't, did he? No. No he didn't. He scored on you, putting the puck in the wide open net. Hell, Lou, he couldn't NOT score. You came forward and left the whole expanse of a FUCKING ARCTIC TUNDRA behind you.

But I still love you. I do. Just... stay in the net okay? That's where you're best.

Love,

Me